Hineni – Here Am I

“Hineni,” the young boy said.IMG_2928 - Version 2

In the third chapter of 1 Samuel, we read of a young Samuel, hearing the call of the Lord three times, and answering three times, “Here I am.” What he actually says, each time, is the Hebrew word hineni. (It sounds something like the ‘hi’ in ‘hit’, then ‘nay’, then the ‘ni’ in ‘nit’ or the ‘nee’ in ‘knee’.) The most common translation is ‘here I am’.

This Hebrew term is found in other places within scripture. In Genesis 22, Abraham responds to the call of God with hineni. Abraham responds to the call of his son with hineni. And he responds to the call of the angel with the same hineni.  In Exodus 3, Moses hears the Lord calling his name, and Moses answers, “Hineni.”

We can learn a lot from this one little term. I invite us to consider two aspects–our response to God and God’s response to us.

How might we recognize the voice of God, or of a messenger of God? Among the many answers we may offer, the fundamental answer is simple: by listening. To say “here I am” to God is to pause quietly in the expectation that God is going to say something. That is no trivial thing. There are plenty of people who believe in God, who live wonderfully exemplary lives, and who never actually stop to listen to God and who never actually seem to expect God to communicate anything. It is easy to believe, or not, in something that is far away, a concept. It is another thing altogether to consider the immediate presence of God and to actively, expectantly listen. It is still more removed if, having heard, we respond.

Consider Abraham. It is interesting that he did not see fit to explain to his servants what he was doing. He did not begin by telling people that he was responding to the voice of God. Perhaps he still wondered himself. And take Moses–suppose someone came and told you that he had heard the voice of God speaking from a bush, and that the bush was on fire, but the fire did not burn the bush. You might very reasonably think that he had eaten the wrong mushrooms.

Entertaining the possibility that a small, faint voice may be the Almighty speaking is an act of faith. It is also an act of freedom, freeing us from the worldly constraint that says that truth always speaks loudly, and that we should listen to the powerful, the mainstream, that we should wrap ourselves in the terrible chains of normality. If we are paying attention, it is pretty clear that Abraham, Moses, Samuel, Isaiah, John the Baptist and Paul were not normal people.

So how we distinguish faith from lunacy? It may be that the only answer is found in these old stories of faith, the stories of Abraham, and Moses, and Samuel, of people who responded to God and whose response was, finally, embraced by the continuous body of the faithful over the centuries. Time and faith were the winnowing fan of scripture. If we are hearing a voice that speaks something radically different from the voices found in scripture, it may not be a voice to follow.

What does it mean when we say to God, “Here am I?” What did the folk in our faith stories bring with them when they said, “Hineni?” There is nothing of ‘Hey, look what I can do for you’, nothing of ‘Here I stand with ability and worth’. In fact, the only thing we can bring is recognition of our emptiness, of our unworthiness to respond to the Almighty.

There is a blessing. When we stop to respond to God, we recognize that all of these burdens, ideas, conceits, and worries we carry around are what they are—nothing in the face of God.

Remember that we are not the only ones saying, “Hineni!” …They shall know that it is I who speak; here am I. (Isaiah 52:6)

These are words of comfort, that we might hear God calling us, and a promise that God is always listening, always present, always waiting. If we pause, quietly, expectantly, we may hear the voice of God whispering, ”Here am I.”

You Are What You Seek

We are what we seek.

Gravel 008Consider the words of Jesus, Seek, and you shall find. (Luke 11:9-10) We tend to hear Jesus’ words as a promise, but perhaps his words are also a warning: seek and ye shall find, whatever it may be that ye seek.

Be ye careful.

There is the word from the gospel of Luke about places of honor. (Luke 14:7ff) Now honor is something we often seek, isn’t it? We want the places of honor, we want other people to approve of us, and we want to look as though we did not care. The gospel might be paraphrased: Don’t seek self aggrandizement at all. Let others worry about that. Seek instead the benefit of those who have nothing to offer in return. How else can we be sure we are not cleverly seeking our own reward?

Jeremiah gives us many a bracing word from the Lord, particularly this passage: Thus says the Lord, What wrong did your ancestors find in me that they went far from me, and went after worthless things, and became worthless themselves? (Jeremiah 2:5)

If we seek worthless things, we find them; worse, we become them.

Finally, there is the passage from Hebrews, For some have entertained angels unaware, we hear. (Hebrews 13:2) Perhaps the writer is telling us that the blessing we seek is not far off, but here, beside us, near us, all along.

Sometimes rather than seeking blessings, we should simply open our eyes to see them, recognizing the angels already around us, seeing the blessings we already have.

Faith Is Like Falling In Love

Faith is like falling in love. All the explanations in the world won’t take the place of living it.

Isaiah, the son of Amoz, was one of the greatest of the prophets.

Rapid StreamWhen we begin reading Isaiah, we are reading words that have been preserved for 2700 years, more or less. That is something to think about right there. We don’t know a great deal about Isaiah, the man. We cannot even be sure that all of the writings gathered together under the heading of Isaiah’s name can be attributed to him. In fact, it is far more likely they were not–some passages were no doubt from another time, added, collected, edited, preserved by the faithful, brought to us over centuries of faith.

The first chapter of Isaiah presents an indictment of the ancient people of Israel. The prophet is speaking the case that God brings against the people, against their behavior, their practices, their hypocrisy. Of course, it doesn’t take much honesty or humility to recognize that all of the same indictments apply to us, either literally or figuratively.

The prophet, speaking on behalf of the Almighty, declares that God is tired of sacrifices, of offerings, of empty rituals. We hear that God wants people to be just, to correct oppression, to defend the fatherless, to protect the weak. And we hear that God is offering cleansing and forgiveness.

Ok, we say, all of that is very much in line with our faith practice, we understand it. Well, here’s something a bit unusual to think about–all of this is being said 700 years before Christ is born.

What is so odd about that?

For starters, most Christians walk around with a pretty simple, black and white understanding of scripture–before Jesus there was the law and judgment, and after the resurrection there is forgiveness and walking in the Spirit. One thing, then the other. Old Testament, then New Testament. One problem, though–this passage won’t fit that arrangement.

What does that mean, might we wonder?

For one thing, there was no switch being flipped when we went from the Old Testament. It isn’t a room in the dark, with someone suddenly turning on the lights when we get to the New Testament. It is more like a train, jerking and rattling on the track maybe, but making steady progress toward leaving the rules behind and rolling with the Spirit all along.

Contrary to what many well meaning folk seem to believe, there is plenty of grace to be found in the Old Testament, even in the middle of a prophetic indictment like this passage.

For another thing, if God was already spreading the word of forgiveness so boldly several hundred years before the crucifixion, maybe we need to revisit what happened at the cross. We need to focus less on explaining what happened and focus more on living in the Spirit that came from it.

It’s not the explanation, it’s the application.

Again, maybe faith is like falling in love. All the explanations in the world won’t take the place of living it.

Excerpts – I, John and Sins of Omission

There are now excerpts from two upcoming novels posted on the website.

Surf

I, John  Of this disciple, Jesus had said, “If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you?” Suppose that John did, indeed remain, and is still alive, in our world, two thousand years later. What would he be doing, thinking, after all this time, and would he be alone?

Bird On WaterSins of Omission  A body is found, a girl who was murdered. Now the residents of this eastern North Carolina town must try to find out what is happening around them, before it happens again.

 

Both novels, along with a few other projects, will be available soon.

Thanks!

Small Things Matter

FlowersA shrewd and dishonest business man, someone who would be at home among the most conniving traders of Wall Street, is caught in his thievery, and he turns and manages to steal yet more goods in order to cast them like bread upon the waters. The story is two thousand years old: it is the first parable in Luke 16.

In a baffling twist, the man is praised for his shrewdness by his own master and by Jesus. Of course, Jesus is also indulging in some biting sarcasm by verse 9: use your dishonest wealth to gain eternal security. We might safely assume he was being at least as sarcastic in the praise of this thieving manager.

Yet, there is the pointed observation that the “children of this age are more shrewd in dealing with their own generation than are the children of the light.” This, I believe we must agree, is straightforward enough.

Consider the observation, “I am not strong enough to dig, and I am ashamed to beg.” We, and the passage itself, refer to this man as the ‘dishonest manager’, but how many of us possess this level of self-honesty? He is not deceiving himself as to his own nature, and he has a very clear understanding of the nature of the people around him. None of the debtors refuses to take the note and to write in a lesser figure; the manager knows they will not refuse. He is even clever enough to get them to make the changes themselves, perhaps to preserve some level of deniability.

That honest self appraisal is the first useful thing we can take from this passage. Taking the lead from Popeye (who took his from Moses’ interview with the Almighty), let us work on being what we are, or at least knowing what we are.

We’re talking self-awareness, not self-centeredness and not self-judgment.

Most of us, like the Pharisees who were one of Jesus’ intended audiences here, are suffering from the onion syndrome. We are layer upon layer wrapped around not much. We need to focus on the center, and the layers will fall away on their own.

It only works if we are shrewd enough to understand our own hearts. What is at the center controls everything.

Perhaps that is the second concept we can hold up from this scripture passage. “Whoever is faithful in a very little is faithful also in much…”

Small things matter.

Years ago, the economist and writer E F Schumacher wrote a book titled Small is Beautiful: Economics As If People Mattered. The title itself is helpful. He wrote, “The way in which we experience and interpret the world obviously depends very much indeed on the kind of ideas that fill our minds. If they are mainly small, weak, superficial, and incoherent, life will appear insipid, uninteresting, petty, and chaotic.”

Let’s pull off the layers like winter coats and take a look at who we are, what we really think, good or bad – we can’t change it until we know it.

Finally, let’s remember some words from Fred Craddock in his commentary Luke in the Interpretation series:

Most of us will not this week christen a ship, write a book, end a war, appoint a cabinet, dine with a queen, convert a nation, or be burned at the stake. More likely the week will present no more than a chance to give a cup of water, write a note, visit a nursing home, vote for a county commissioner, teach a Sunday school class, share a meal, tell a child a story, go to choir practice, and feed the neighbor’s cat. “Whoever is faithful in a very little is faithful also in much.”

Small things matter. Amen.